My agency has an opening for an art director, and I’ve placed an online Help Wanted ad which includes one non-negotiable prerequisite: “Previous Ad Agency experience absolutely required.” Here’s a very brief (and verbatim) sampling of the responses I’ve received: “I am a graduating senior in college that is looking for a part time career … Read More
I recently read (and mostly enjoyed) Stephen King’s latest novel, 11/22/63. Which, to make a very long story short, is a book involving time travel. For some reason, it’s reminded me of a real life King-ly story from my own past. So join me as we return to a balmy evening in 1978 — a couple … Read More
This column was originally published in the January, 2012 issue of B-Metro Magazine. Now seemed like a good time to re-post it. Almost true story: A fine Southern lady and her daughter are taking a cab through New York, when the young girl asks about several brazenly-dressed women standing at a nearby street corner. “Well, sweetheart,” … Read More
I wrote the following email first thing in the morning on September 12, 2001. Hope you find it worthwhile reading. If Jerry Maguire can do it, so can I – – – So here is my personal manifesto: I believe our nation as a whole, and each of us individually, has been given the … Read More
Almost true story: It’s the first day of kindergarten for Brian Giattina’s son, and his turn comes to introduce himself. “I’m Gus. My dad runs a meth lab and an extortion ring.” Horrified, the teacher pulls him aside. “Gus, your father is a good man. Why would you say something like that?” “I didn’t want … Read More
When I grow up, I want to be like Calvin Morris. If you’ve ever passed the Publix shopping center on Green Springs during weekday lunch hours, Calvin is the guy dancing on the sidewalk with the Firehouse Subs sign. In my entire life, I have never seen anyone bring more joy to his work. Calvin … Read More
## The following “Farewell” column was written by Thomas Spencer for the 10/26/03 issue of The Birmingham News. It remains one of my all-time favorite pieces from that fine and venerable publication. ## Lord Baltimore Gin was his balm and pork his passion. Virtually every evening after work, Franklin Headen would hold court from a … Read More
REMEMBERING TECH’S COOLEST CONTROL FREAK. It’s six days after Steve Jobs’ death, and I interrupted my work flow this morning to click on a melodramatic story headline about the biological father he never knew. Needless to say, I can’t ever remember being so endlessly fascinated by a company CEO—which is why, at the 11th hour … Read More
(A true story, by Bob Carlton) NOTE: Bob wrote this column for The Birmingham News August 6, 1999 . If you asked me, it’s still just as good 12 years later. I have seen the Blair Witch. It was right outside my tent. But first some background: Last week, I interrupted my annual baseball vacation … Read More
If you asked me, Pete Townshend’s classic line has a lot more to do with attitude than age. First, make no mistake: When it comes to lifestyle, nobody’s older for his age than me. At 25, I married the perfect excuse to stop going out on weeknights. Six years later, we gave birth to the … Read More
